Preamble.

This week officially commenced the support raising process for my internship in Russia this summer.  I recently found out the specific price of the trip, allowing me to send out letters soon with all the details.  Due to that, this blog is largely going to be about Russia these next few months.  I hope to use it to post prayer requests, and give updates on the whole process (especially while I am there).  That being said, I want to share a few thoughts about trust as I begin this journey that could largely determine future plans post-Moody.  

E.M. Bounds has a quote on trust that has challenged my perspective about planning this trip.

"Trust is faith that has become absolute, approved, and accomplished. When all is said and done, there is a sort of risk in faith and its exercise. But trust is firm belief; it is faith in full bloom. Trust is a conscious act, a fact of which we are aware. " 

My trust in God about this trip ought to be something that is absolute, approved, and accomplished.  In other words, as I am raising money, I ought to trust God that He has already absolutely accomplished everything that needs to happen in order for me to board a plane for Russia.  My trust in God ought to be out of a firm belief in His provision and purpose.  Whew, I am severely lacking in such belief.  I too often take things into my own hands and make lists and accomplish tasks that reflect my distrust in God.  Those things are not bad in and of themselves, but when done in one's inability to rely on God's strength, they are sinful and meaningless.  Due to this, my theme prayer in this whole process must be Mark 9:24:

"Lord, I believe, help my unbelief!" 

God has called us to believe firmly in Him, because in doing so, we are able to go deeper and deeper into the depths of who He is and greatly strengthen out relationship with Him.  This is why God says in Isaiah 41:10, "Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand."  We are not to fear because He is with us.  As a professor recently pointed out, the verse does not say, "fear not, for I am sovereign," or, "fear not for I am trustworthy."  While these things are absolutely true and wonderful, the verse says we are not to fear because God is WITH us, in relationship with us, working on our behalf for His glory.  Such a relational, loving God who is always with us can certainly be trusted for all things.  

A perspective shift must occur in my mindset about this trip as I begin.  I must stop viewing it as something to be accomplished, and start viewing as a way to more deeply interact with my Creator God who is already with me and eager to provide me with all I need so I can accomplish His purpose.  This is absolute, approved, and accomplished trust.  Lord, in my moments of unbelief, help my unbelief and give me the ability to trust you more.