I love getting affirmation from people. I'm often asking my friends whether or not they agree with on a given topic. One of my favorite things to say to others is "what's your opinion?" In fact, I find it really hard to make a decision without the affirmation of a friend or family member. The question I am wrestling through today, however, is how much I ask, or even care about, God's opinion.
In John 15:5, Christ says, "Apart from me, you can do nothing." This idea is usually my mentality with my friends or family..."apart from my family, I can do nothing." Or, "apart from my friends, I can do nothing." Where does God fit in with all of this? Do I truly believe that I can do nothing without God? How much of a role does He really play in my decision making process?
I often look to worldly things to fulfill something that only God can. It seems good in the moment to ask a friend's advice about a big life decision because she can give me an instant "yes" or "no." She will rarely say, "hmm, keep asking me every day, and when the time is right, I will give you an answer." This is appealing to my impatient, worldly mind. When I go to the Lord for advice, it often involves a lot of silence (see blog post on Quiet), patience, humility, and the possibility that I am not going to like the answer. Despite all of these things, who do I really want directing my life: a friend who is just as sinful as I am, or the God of the universe, my Creator who is "familiar with all my ways"(Psalm 139:3). I am embarrassed at how quickly I forget this truth. My heart is so focused on immediate gratification that I ignore the very reason for which I am here, which is to humbly follow the Lord wherever He leads. May I learn to go to the Lord first, to seek His will, to be excited about waiting for His guidance. It is, in fact, in waiting for the Lord's response that true growth in one's relationship with Christ happens. Waiting on God is something I have never regretted in the long run.
Here is an excerpt from Spurgeon's devotional book, Morning and Evening. It talks about going to God with every decision much better than my words :)
"You cannot without the Spirit-"Without me ye can do nothing." O branch of the vine, thou canst have no fruit without the sap! O child of God, thou hast no life within thee apart from the life which God gives thee through his Spirit! Then let us not grieve him or provoke him to anger by our sin. Let us not quench him in one of his faintest motions in our soul; let us foster every suggestion, and be ready to obey every prompting. If the Holy Spirit be indeed so mighty, let us attempt nothing without him; let us begin no project, and carry on no enterprise, and conclude no transaction, without imploring his blessing."
Friday, November 18, 2011
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Thy Fuel.
Deliver Me
Amy Carmichael
From prayer that asks that I may be
Sheltered from winds that beat on Thee
From fearing when I should aspire,
From faltering when I should climb higher,
From silken self, O Captain, free
Thy solder who would follow Thee.
From subtle love of softening things,
From easy choices, weakenings
(Not thus are spirits fortified,
Not this way went the Crucified),
From all that dims Thy Calvary,
O Lamb of God, deliver me.
Give me the love that leads the way,
The faith that nothing can dismay,
The hope no disappointments tire,
The passion that will burn like fire;
Let me not sink to be a clod:
Make me Thy fuel, Flame of God.
My dad's mom died when he was seven, so I never met her. She went to Moody however, so I feel a strange connection with her. My dad found an old tear out of this poem in one of her books after she had died. It was a poem that was very influential in her life. May it be so in mine.
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Quiet.
As an extrovert, one of the hardest things for me to do is be quiet. I always want to be talking to someone, or listening to someone else talk to me (or even listening to my ipod talk to me). Recently, however, God has helped me realize how this quality has carried over into my times with Him. I find it so easy to talk to God, usually about the requests of others. In fact, I have found that it is sometimes much easier to pray for others rather than pray through my complicated issues. Perhaps I know deep down that when I do start praying through my own confessions and issues, I will have to be silent to hear God's response. This is a scary thing to someone with my personality. I am so intimidated by silence, especially when it comes to silence before the throne. Heaven forbid that God reveal to me more sin in my life that I actually need to change (sense the sarcasm there?). I think to myself, "If I keep babbling, keep reading the Bible without stopping to listen, and then keep talking to others about what I am learning in fellowship, I will grow...I don't have to have silent in my walk with the Lord." My, how much am I missing out on in my relationship with God?!
Dietrich Bonhoeffer states in Life Together that "one who wants fellowship without solitude plunges into the void of words and feelings." I fear that I have arrived in such a void. I must make more time to be silent in my morning times with the Lord. This does not mean journaling, reading, talking, or interceding. It means sitting before the throne with a humble heart, ready to hear the voice of the Almighty, or even just sense His holy presence. Father, may I come before you with a quiet heart. As Andrew Murray puts it, may I "take time to be quiet and comprehend God." Spiritual growth starts with a correct view of God, may I comprehend Him.
Dietrich Bonhoeffer states in Life Together that "one who wants fellowship without solitude plunges into the void of words and feelings." I fear that I have arrived in such a void. I must make more time to be silent in my morning times with the Lord. This does not mean journaling, reading, talking, or interceding. It means sitting before the throne with a humble heart, ready to hear the voice of the Almighty, or even just sense His holy presence. Father, may I come before you with a quiet heart. As Andrew Murray puts it, may I "take time to be quiet and comprehend God." Spiritual growth starts with a correct view of God, may I comprehend Him.
Friday, November 4, 2011
Grateful for This.
I feel like God often gives me themes for each semester of my journey at Moody. Built into this theme is a conviction of a sin that is holding me captive, and a quality that I need to work on. Something that I have been deeply challenged with lately is my lack of contentment. Whether I am frustrated that I have to spend my Friday night writing a paper (even if it is about the Bible), or impatient with this season of life and waiting for the next, or even angered that I still have to eat the food in Moody's dining hall, I always find something to be unhappy about (it's a gift, really).
God slowly opened my eyes to my negative attitude and lack of contentment with the situations He has placed me in. I became aware that my thoughts throughout the day often focus on what I do not have. It is as if I am saying to God, "I am so unhappy because I do not have this shallow thing I want, and I do not really believe that the things you give me are all I need." Well, that's a bold statement to the God of the universe! So, with all that said, my theme for this semester has been....gratitude.
In order to cultivate a grateful heart, one must stop focusing on the circumstances of this world, or what one lacks, and focus on what one has been given through Christ. Brennan Manning, in his book Ruthless Trust, says, "When we're inwardly dissipated through busyness, obsession, addiction, mindlessness, and preoccupation with TV, sports, gossip, movies, shallow reading, and so forth, we cannot be attentive to the gifts that arrive each day." My, how true this is! However, what I am learning more and more about myself, is that I read quotes like this, think they are profound, and then do nothing to let them change me. What if believers started letting these nuggets of truth impact their life. What if believers really examined the implications of cultivating gratitude, and starting forsaking the things of the world in order to see more and more of what God has given. In fact, it is only when this happens, that one can be a more effective vessel for the Kingdom. Being grateful takes the focus off of selfish gain and personal satisfaction, and places the focus on God. J.I.Packer says in Rediscovering Holiness, "All ventures go rotten at the core when gain in any form, rather than gratitude, motivates them." Only gratitude can pave the way to holiness and the ability to be a servant for Christ. Along with gratitude comes humility, diligence, joy, peace, and so much more. May we stop focusing on what we do not have, and be grateful for what God has given us, which is, after all, more than sufficient.
God slowly opened my eyes to my negative attitude and lack of contentment with the situations He has placed me in. I became aware that my thoughts throughout the day often focus on what I do not have. It is as if I am saying to God, "I am so unhappy because I do not have this shallow thing I want, and I do not really believe that the things you give me are all I need." Well, that's a bold statement to the God of the universe! So, with all that said, my theme for this semester has been....gratitude.
In order to cultivate a grateful heart, one must stop focusing on the circumstances of this world, or what one lacks, and focus on what one has been given through Christ. Brennan Manning, in his book Ruthless Trust, says, "When we're inwardly dissipated through busyness, obsession, addiction, mindlessness, and preoccupation with TV, sports, gossip, movies, shallow reading, and so forth, we cannot be attentive to the gifts that arrive each day." My, how true this is! However, what I am learning more and more about myself, is that I read quotes like this, think they are profound, and then do nothing to let them change me. What if believers started letting these nuggets of truth impact their life. What if believers really examined the implications of cultivating gratitude, and starting forsaking the things of the world in order to see more and more of what God has given. In fact, it is only when this happens, that one can be a more effective vessel for the Kingdom. Being grateful takes the focus off of selfish gain and personal satisfaction, and places the focus on God. J.I.Packer says in Rediscovering Holiness, "All ventures go rotten at the core when gain in any form, rather than gratitude, motivates them." Only gratitude can pave the way to holiness and the ability to be a servant for Christ. Along with gratitude comes humility, diligence, joy, peace, and so much more. May we stop focusing on what we do not have, and be grateful for what God has given us, which is, after all, more than sufficient.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Listful Thinking
Lists. They are wonderful and they are horrible. In one sense, they help the individual determine how many tasks need to get done, and what is the priority of each task. In another sense, they can distract from reality, and take precedence over flexibility or time with people.
Charles E. Hummel, in his article entitled Tyranny of the Urgent (look it up, read it.), shows the danger of becoming a task-oriented person. Using the example of Jesus, Hummel acknowledges that Jesus was able to affirm that He had done all of the Father's will at the end of His life. Some people may scoff at this and ask, "but there were still so many sick people, so many miracles left undone, so many poor and hungry." Ahh, are not these questions we ask ourselves when determining our tasks for the day? We look at tasks, and try to figure out in our human mindset what we must get done in order to have accomplished something. When we do not make it through the list (which we rarely do), we are left with a sense of discouragement and failure. What if instead, we prayed every morning for the Lord to direct us in our tasks that day. Give us wisdom and discernment on what needs to get done, what can wait, and what needs to be added that we have been neglecting. Perhaps at the end of every day in which this prayer is central, we will lay our heads on our pillow, satisfied that we served God in all of the ways He directed that day. Sure, we may not have accomplished everything on our list, but really, how important are some of those things that we say must get done in light of the eternal perspective of pleasing our Jesus.
Not to babble, but how might this apply to our prayer life? I often make a list of people I need to intercede for, and then run down that list, satisfied that I have completed my Christian duty for the day. Richard Foster, in his book, The Celebration of Discipline, argues that one cannot interceded until he himself is in tune with the will of God. Foster says, "We must hear, know, and obey the will of God before we pray it into the lives of others. The prayer of guidance constantly precedes and surrounds the prayer of faith." Foster even encourages that before one intercedes, he should ask God if that specific situation is a prayer task for him. Wow, what if I asked this question of God before hastily interceding in my grocery list of prayer requests. Perhaps I should meet with God first before lifting others up before His throne. It seems so simple, yet I am so prone to just focus on my list and cross of those names. God, give me grace to sit with you and ask for your guidance before preceding with my lists of the day.
Charles E. Hummel, in his article entitled Tyranny of the Urgent (look it up, read it.), shows the danger of becoming a task-oriented person. Using the example of Jesus, Hummel acknowledges that Jesus was able to affirm that He had done all of the Father's will at the end of His life. Some people may scoff at this and ask, "but there were still so many sick people, so many miracles left undone, so many poor and hungry." Ahh, are not these questions we ask ourselves when determining our tasks for the day? We look at tasks, and try to figure out in our human mindset what we must get done in order to have accomplished something. When we do not make it through the list (which we rarely do), we are left with a sense of discouragement and failure. What if instead, we prayed every morning for the Lord to direct us in our tasks that day. Give us wisdom and discernment on what needs to get done, what can wait, and what needs to be added that we have been neglecting. Perhaps at the end of every day in which this prayer is central, we will lay our heads on our pillow, satisfied that we served God in all of the ways He directed that day. Sure, we may not have accomplished everything on our list, but really, how important are some of those things that we say must get done in light of the eternal perspective of pleasing our Jesus.
Not to babble, but how might this apply to our prayer life? I often make a list of people I need to intercede for, and then run down that list, satisfied that I have completed my Christian duty for the day. Richard Foster, in his book, The Celebration of Discipline, argues that one cannot interceded until he himself is in tune with the will of God. Foster says, "We must hear, know, and obey the will of God before we pray it into the lives of others. The prayer of guidance constantly precedes and surrounds the prayer of faith." Foster even encourages that before one intercedes, he should ask God if that specific situation is a prayer task for him. Wow, what if I asked this question of God before hastily interceding in my grocery list of prayer requests. Perhaps I should meet with God first before lifting others up before His throne. It seems so simple, yet I am so prone to just focus on my list and cross of those names. God, give me grace to sit with you and ask for your guidance before preceding with my lists of the day.
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